Tag Archives: compassion

It Was Not Until I Realized That…

I used to not see compassion, kindness and love as being so instrumental to this world’s future (and to all of humanity) and furthermore would never have thought that these three words would define my consciousness…

until I realized that
I am who I am –
and learned to be
in love with that
who I am

I used to feel uncomfortable hearing that I am “really nice” and being able to see it as the compliment (as was the case with embracing other compliments as well) it is and was…

until I realized that
I am who I am –
and learned to be
in love with that
who I am

I used to see the world (and people therein) as a big scary place, especially those places (and those people) in the far distance over “there” where “they” reside….
until I realized
I am who I am –
and they are
who they are –
and learned to be
in love with that

who I am

I used to talk a lot, or more aptly, way too much because it did not allow myself the opportunity to listen (and yes, I have very good hearing and often hear even that which I am not supposed to hear, but whether someone says something positive or something negative about me, it really has little to do with me) and it was not until I got really quiet that I heard what was really important. But that lesson, as so many others, it was not…

until I realized that
I am who I am –
and I learned to be
in love with that

who I am

That I found
with myself
and who I am
And I learned to be
being only


Shame, It is, A Losing Game

I have not the wisdom to know the solution
nor the foresight to have THE answer
but, then again, who really does?
if it was that easy, would there not already be
an answer or even better a viable solution?
but then again maybe, just maybe, that thing
called life is a bit more complicated? than that…….
and maybe, just maybe, we don’t really know?
those that say they do, do they really? really???
for as easy it is to look at someone else’s
situation and to frown upon them for their lack
of judgment and their action and/or inaction
with clarity and hindsight as unfortunate as it
may be have we not ourselves — ALL OF US
had our moments of transgressions where we
might have had the good fortunate of doing so
in the solitude of our own misfortunes where
only a few were on the scene and we had not
the cameras pointed at us when we were lapsing
in our judgment, because maybe one day it will
be and while public shame is the game of the day
where the lynchings in the court of public opinion
is rampant and it is not only ok but advocated
until that one day it happens to be us and then
just maybe it won’t be quite the same when it is
our father, our mother, our son, our daughter,
or yes……even ourselves, are put into the center
spotlight of public shame when the world passes
out blame hand and foot without regard to who
you are, or they are, as a person but only see one
situation and deem that to be all there is to know.
Maybe we know so far less than we like to think
we do…..maybe, just maybe…..
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there is a level of humanity that we may be missing.

Too Blind To See

Is Color Blind

There are
Of all colors
From all walks of life
From all faiths
From all backgrounds
From all corners
Of the world
Rich and poor







Is Color Blind

There are
Of all colors
From all walks of life
From all faiths
From all backgrounds
From all corners
Of the world
Rich and poor








Ain’t That A (Public) Shame

Ain’t that a shame
seeing it being
the hottest ticket in town
crowd after crowd
liking it, sharing it,
reveling in the name
of public shaming
because of course
they deserved it
and that somehow
it makes it all right
to make a permanent
mark digitally filed
for all the world to see
to like, to share, to
revel in the name
of public shaming
because of course
they deserved it
who cares if there
is mistaken identity
or even if they did
what they did
have we but forgotten
from kindergarten
all that was taught
play nice with others
if you don’t have
anything nice
to say….
is compassion
is kindness
a lost art
forgotten or
simply not practiced
with it being far
too much more fun
to bask in someone
else’s failures,mistakes
and or misfortunes
to like, to share, to
revel in the name
of public shaming
because of course
they deserved it
never mind that
no one is immune
to stupidity
whatever the age
and part of being
a teenager is
making mistakes
and hopefully
living to tell about it
has not everyone
done something
that was wrong
or wish it could be
taken back
but was never
caught on camera
for the entire world
to see
to like, to share, to
revel in the name
of public shaming
because of course
you deserved it
how quickly we forget
that we are all the same
separates us from
humanity, because
seeing people as people
to look them in the eye
to see them as
a son, a daughter
as a father or a mother
or even simply as a
human being
that is forgotten
because it is hard
to hear amidst
all of the screaming
name calling
of one another
as the cycle
perpetuating into
becoming the norm
to like, to share, to
revel in the name
of public shaming
because of course
they deserved it
but, then again
it’s all fun and games
until they
becomes you
and your name
is in the cross hairs
of the game
with everyone
lining up excited
to see the hottest
ticket in town
maybe then
it is no longer funny
no longer the same
but then again
lost is kindness
and compassion
until then and only then
is it found
once again


Have you ever seen those videos on Youtube where people perform unbelievable feats?   The beauty though is that there are amazing people every single day performing amazing feats of kindness that will never make it onto video.  There are amazing people showing compassion that will never make the headlines, but they are out there, every single day.

Yesterday, it dawned on me that I had not received the text notification that it was time for me to change out the air filter in my house’s A/C unit.  It is probably actually way overdue, so I went through the process of opening it and realized quickly it needed some tender loving care.   Then, went about the process of cleaning it, and spent several hours doing so.  What I neglected to do, in a rather elementary mistake, was to turn off the power and ended up shorting out the unit.

It is what it is.  I am not handy.  I have much to learn.

Most of life’s tasks are pretty simple, like cleaning the A/C unit, but I only know what I know.    Once something goes awry, then I’ve exceeded my limited knowledge.

What were my options? I could call someone for service, although that is not in the budget.  I could, and did, call my parents, which is my normal first line of defense and their advice was sound, but I felt it best to listen to my intuition.

Do nothing.

I left the house, went to see a friend and let it be.  It is what it is.

I like, like most of us, experience stress and anxiety.  Mine is centered around financial, which I would gather to guess, that is to some degree common with most of us.   The beauty of listening to my body is that it is telling. And, of late, my body has been screaming at me.

By letting go, and detaching from the situation I let myself become at peace with the situation.  The problem will be fixed when it does, not a second sooner or a second later.  That minute, hours, possibly days in between, that is where we tend to experience worry, which leads to anxiety.   So, my focus instead was being in the moment.

When I got home yesterday evening, there were many blessings to count.  It was overcast; it has even rained, so the house was not in direct sunlight all day.   I also don’t get overheated easily.  As a result, I was rather comfortable and slept soundly.

This morning, the garage door next door was open as I mowed my grass.  My neighbor is much the opposite of me. He is incredibly handy.  He makes amazing metallic art, is building his own furniture, and guess what?  His profession is A/C work.

I knew that he does and knew eventually he would be available to ask his advice, and furthermore, he too only knows what he knows.  Computers are not his forte, so I go over and help him when he has questions.   In return, he will give me pieces of his artwork, sometimes fish if he has it, which I love all of it.

I am not someone who is going to go over and knock on his door and say, “Hey, my A/C is out.”

I won’t.  When his garage door is down, he is with his family, and I am not going to interrupt that.   Mine can wait, and it did.

When I saw him in the garage working, I went over and told him my situation.  Easy fix, he told me.   All I did was blow my fuse inside the A/C unit.   He asked if I had a fuse (which, of course, I did not) so he gave me one and told me that it is easy to replace, but if I had any questions or needed further assistance, he would come over.

I opened up the panel to discover the fuse staring me in the face.   It was as plain as day, and it literally took me less than 5 minutes to complete the entire task.

Before I had left his garage after he gave me the fuse, I asked him if he needed any storage containers.  I had extra and offered to give him some.  He accepted, so when I went over to tell him thank you, I took them with me.  It gave me such great pleasure being able to feel like I was able to contribute.

In fact, it gave me more pleasure than it did getting my A/C fixed.   And, what truly was amazing about my neighbor is something I call “the thought before the thought.”   When I told him my situation, he knew it was a problem with the fuse.  He immediately, even before I answered if I had one, was looking for one to give to me.  He was happy to help me, just as I was happy to help him.

While there, he asked me about our new neighbors.  I am the one everybody asks, because I am the first to go over and introduce myself.   When I moved into the neighborhood, I put a hand written note in everyone’s mailbox and invited them to my house that upcoming weekend for some lasagna and an opportunity for them to meet me, and vice versa.

When we meet someone, it is an opportunity to set boundaries as well as expectations.    Beyond that, for most people, first impressions mean a lot, and in some cases what is remembered most.

What do I think about our new neighbors?  “They are awesome!!!”

Granted, whenever someone asks about any of my neighbors I say the same, but it is true.  As long as someone is kind to me, that is all that matters. Even if they are not, I am not going to express that to someone else, because it is my experience.  It does not mean they will have a different experience.   I wouldn’t want to taint someone’s perceptions based upon something negative that I had to say. Plus, I like to treat people like I like to be treated.

It matters not what their interests are, what they believe, or if we have any common interests. I am not dating them.  They are someone who lives next to me, and that means if I see them outside, I will smile.  I will waive.

After getting my AC operational, I went back to mowing. I have a large corner lot with a sizeable amount of grass that I mow myself.   Most of those living around me ask why I also mow the commons area behind my house.   “You don’t have to you, you know.”

That is true. There is a lot in this world that I don’t have to do.  I don’t have to, but I do choose to do so.

“Why?”   (The question that starts at 2, but seemingly never ends).

“Does it look better when you walk by?”   I ask.   “Do you like the way it looks?”

Yes, of course, they do.   What they do not see is the line drawn from my property to the common’s area.   Furthermore, if it beautifies my entire property, making it a more pleasurable sight not only for myself but for others, then the question I would ask would be, why wouldn’t I mow it?

Speaking of the way it looks, I have come to a place where if I like something, I make it a practice to tell someone.   Yesterday, while in Ft. Lauderdale, I was walking back to my car and a woman was looking at herself in the mirror of her makeup thing (I’m sure that’s the technical term).  The thought before the thought in my head was, “You are enough.”  So, I said aloud, “You look amazing” and kept walking.

Everyone has something amazing about them – that special nuance that makes them unique and special.

And, while kindness does not make headlines, and compassion is not something that draws an audience, it is amazing to find those amazing people who practice both.   Today, for me, it was my neighbor.   Tomorrow, it may be someone else I know, or it could be a total stranger.


People are Amazing!